Finding the Right Things to Reach for in You Relationship

Are you frustrated that no matter how much you try to get connection, appreciation, or acceptance from your partner, it just gets further out of reach? You might be reaching for the wrong thing! Reaching for stand-in needs instead of true attachment needs Many people...

Getting Out of Your Conflict Déjà Vu Loop

Conversation 1 Déjà Vu Conflict and Disconnection Have you found yourself in an endless loop of “déjà vu” moments – the same basic conflict on repeat? Whether it’s about chores, money, date night, or another topic, you get stuck in the same basic pattern of pursue and...

What are the 7 Hold Me Tight® Conversations For A Lifetime of Love

Hold Me Tight® Seattle Workshops are divided into 7 conversations for a lifetime of love based on Sue Johnson’s best selling book from 2008 and the Emotionally Focused Therapy process. Each conversation is introduced with a time of teaching and group discussion....

Being Truly Known & Loved

Conversation 4 What is a Hold Me Tight® Conversation? Powerful moments in relationship come when you are truly known by your partner – flaws and all – and still experience your partner’s acceptance and desire to be with you. That is the destination of the...

Find the Fix to Primal Panic

What is ‘Primal Panic’? When your primary attachment bond is threatened, you are wired to have an intense reaction. Sue Johnson calls this response primal panic. She coined the term in her book, Hold Me Tight®. It refers to your wired-in need for a safe...

How To Know When You’re Ready to Repair

Relationship Repair After a Rocky Moment Many of us go through life trying to avoid painful moments of rupture or hurt with our partner. These efforts rarely work. Instead, they reinforce and intensify our painful cycle. Emotionally Focused Therapists and Hold Me...